Simple moments of humor and love best tell of my dad’s legacy. In the simple moments, Dad told us stories, beamed with pride at our accomplishments, and joyfully danced with us.
One of my favorite moments is when we were little girls and we would put dad’s shoes on his feet. What fun it was! Before family outings, Dad would tell us we could leave once we put his shoes on his feet. He would be freshly showered, clean shaven (except for the horrible beard season!), and smelling of Old Spice and Brylcreem. My sisters and I would pile on top of Dad and try to guide (force!) his feet into his shoes. Dad bent and contorted his foot so that it would not go easily into his shoe. We giggled, squealed and begged him to get his foot into the shoe.
After much effort, Dad would relent and we’d get one shoe on! We then moved to the second foot -- more giggles, squeals and begging as we forced his foot into the shoe. Eventually, we would get his second foot into the shoe, celebrate our success and then realize he had taken his first foot out of his shoe! And the adventure started all over again.
Four young girls, two freshly polished loafers, and one mischievous dad created moments where love and playfulness flourished.
As dads go, I got a really good one. I’ve never doubted Dad’s delight in my mother or in his daughters. We were (are) cherished, respected and loved by a strong and caring man. Without knowing it, Dad taught me some fundamental truths about love that has impacted me laterally, downward and upward.
His legacy shows laterally in the men that my sisters and I have married. My husband, Ken, is compassionate, engaging, and wise. In the dark of the night when he reaches for my hand, the tender warmth of his touch tells that I’m cherished and loved. His love, protection and care for our daughters display what a remarkable dad his is. He attended tea parties with dolls, baited hooks and taught them to fish, fixed their cars, and attended every single school performance. Ken’s love, humor, and tender strength are an encouraging presence in our lives. Our daughters are resilient and passionate women as a result of his imprint on them.
Dad’s legacy continues downward as our oldest daughter marries the love of her life later this Spring. While I don’t know what kind of dad her fiance will be, I see the love, playfulness, and steady strength he exhibits with our daughter. It fills my heart as I anticipate the family they will build. I believe the legacy will continue downward through their children too as another good man creates cherished moments with his children.
Dad’s imprint on me also significantly influenced my relationship upward with God. I think when Dad reads this he will be surprised at his influence on my faith walk. You see, Dad is not a ‘religious’ man. He didn’t read to me from the Bible or pray with me nightly. He came from a generation where faith is a private matter so I’m not sure exactly what Dad believes.
But what I do know is that his love for me influenced my relationship with God. The tender strength of Dad’s hug provides me with a sense of affection and safety. Few things sooth my soul more than a hug that tells me of the warmth of Dad’s presence.
It’s not lost on me that those hugs teach me about God’s love. It is said that relationships with dads directly influence how we see God. My friends who have harsh dads are lead to believe God is rigid and oppressive. Friends with absent dads fear that God will neglect and abandon them too. And then there are those, like me, who have loving dads who demonstrate our Heavenly Father’s loving kindness.
My dad is not perfect. There were times when he was silent that I wished he would have spoken. And in my imperfection as a daughter, there were times when I kept Dad silent instead of inviting him to speak into my life. Those times of quiet have also lead me to expect silence from God. And in my sin, has lead me to ignore His voice.
Even in the imperfection, Dad’s love is evident. While he may have been quiet, his tender strength and presence provide me with a foundation to give and to receive love. I know what it means to climb into my father’s lap to be comforted and loved. It makes it easy for me to imagine doing the same with my Heavenly Father. And I’m grateful that Dad’s legacy leaves an eternal imprint on me.
